(unmarked journal entry – presumably matthew 27)

so many components…

physical action teamed up with attitudes, emotions and thoughts, all as an answer to Scripture long laid out before hand. there were no coincidences when it came to Jesus’ death. nothing that happened was ‘sort of’ what was supposed to happen. it was a very complicated list things that would, that had to take part and be in certain places as a part of this ceremony of sorts.

it may not seem ceremonious, it looks like a cruel death. but God, in His infinite wisdom, saw fit to carry this out in a very specific place & time with a particular cast of players.

organizing a large events with volunteers that want to do their jobs, knowingly, can be difficult enough sometimes. But, here we have such an assortment of disconnected people, that we must say that this must be God’s plan, because this course of events couldn’t have happened on their own, and we see Jesus steering certain elements that lead up to this terrible event. He, as the Son, is being obedient to the Word of the Father, which is a part of who He is in the first place…

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i will never claim to understand the will and mind of God. i am grateful that He allows us, by His Spirit, to see little glimpses of His will and insights into the desire of His heart. but even then, we must trust that His ways have a higher purpose when we find ourselves in our own personal gardens of gethsemane. we must continue to pray alongside Jesus, ‘not my will Father, but Yours be done.’ because until we come to the day that the Lord returns, or takes us home, we will continue to struggle and be struggled against.

life is not an accident. life is not a series of unrelated events. there is purpose and meaning, we just need to peel back the surface, see past the garbage that the enemy has laid out before our eyes. he tries to obscure what was once beautiful and pure with ugly distractions and self serving motivations. and so, we must stay the course, day after day after day…because our time here, these struggles that we endure are temporary. Jesus knew that what He had to go through was going to be horrific, but it was still temporary.

we are never told that life is ever going to be easy. and rest assured, if you set your course with God, rough seas are coming up ahead. but it all works for His glory, and for the blessing of His children. stay the course. hold firmly to Him.