“17 When evening came, He arrived with the Twelve. 18 While they were reclining and eating, Jesus said, “I assure you: One of you will betray Me — one who is eating with Me!”

19 They began to be distressed and to say to Him one by one, “Surely not I?”

20 He said to them, “It is one of the Twelve — the one who is dipping bread with Me in the bowl. 21 For the Son of Man will go just as it is written about Him, but woe to that man by whom the Son of Man is betrayed! It would have been better for that man if he had not been born.”

Mark 14:17-21

— 

And while there would be only one betrayer, there would also be a triple-denier and nine who would abandon Him. Only John would stay nearby until everything was over. They all swore it wouldn’t be them, that they would stick with Him, support Him, die with Him. But only one out of the twelve would be faithful through it all. Loyalty to self overruled loyalty to Jesus for most of His closest disciples when push came to shove that night. 

This makes me wonder about us today. So far and so long removed from Jesus being here physically, how many of us give in too easily when things get difficult? How quickly do we step back from our faith and commitments when things get hard? How often do we choose self and selfishness over loyalty and devotion? 

For example, given the opportunity, how many remain quiet about their faith at work and school rather than speak up and share? Given the opportunity, how many people choose the easy path of ineffectiveness rather than press against discomfort and reach out to people in their community? Given the opportunity, how many people neglect their commitments to the ministries of the church because they are a) tired, b) forgot, c) just didn’t feel like it, lacking discipline and commitment to the body of Christ? 

When Jesus warned against those who cry ‘Lord, Lord’ but had no actual relationship with Him, and I wonder where that line is sometimes. Where does grace finally turn over to resignation to the flesh? Where is that line where self-concern finally won out over submission? Where did faith give way to fear? When did convenience win out over conviction? What is the line between John and James or John and Peter? 

If we have our eyes set on Jesus, desiring to grow in Him, wanting to be conformed to His likeness, then we should have no fear of crossing those lines. The committed disciple of Jesus Christ doesn’t daily wonder how close they are to abandonment and/or betrayal. Rather, they are daily seeking Him out, abiding in Him, taking up their cross and living out their faith. They are working out the salvation that has been freely received in grace by faith in Christ in their daily lives. There is no fear of abandoning Jesus because they are following Him, walking with Him, imitating His example as they GoLove others. 

The heart that has received Christ won’t flirt with abandoning Christ. The heart that has been baptized into His death, burial and ressurection won’t seek how far it can stray from Him. Dedication, devotion and discipleship are firmly embedded in the heart and mind of those who daily take up their cross.