I can’t tell you how many people I’ve talked to over the years who have listened to the little whispers that told them they could fly solo in faith. “Oh, my church is nature. I experience God out on my own.” or “I’ve been hurt by people in the church, so I can’t go back.” or “The church is full of hypocrites anyway. I can have a relationship with Jesus on my own.” or “Oh, I pray every day. I talk to God. I’m good.”

The Lies that Separate

The enemy is older than we are. He knows how we’re wired. He knows how to push our emotional buttons. Human beings are not that complex, not that different one from the other. The lie of individualism has stripped us from understanding this truth. At the beginning with Adam in the Garden, we were told “It is not good for man to be alone.” And that’s not just about marriage, but it is because we are made in the image of God. And God exists perfectly in Trinity and Trinity in unity. God exists in community within Himself. And since we are made in His image, we also are to exist within community.

To deny community is to deny a portion of our likeness to Him.

But life is hard. Other people are difficult. Other people are imperfect. Other people do hurtful things sometimes…and then we must also look into the mirror and admit we also walk in imperfection. The lies that separate us from one another can be anything like:

• It’s safer if I just do this myself.
• I know what the Bible says, I don’t need anyone else to tell me what to do.
• I can just watch some sermons online or on TV, it’s all the same.
• I can visit a bunch of different churches if I feel lonely, but I don’t need to commit to one.
• I know those people are all just hypocrites anyway. They’re just going for show.
• I haven’t found a church that teaches the real Gospel, the one I believe.
• I’ll get involved when life settles out, when I feel ready.
• I’ll go to church again someday when I get rid of this sin/problem that’s holding me down.

And there are so many more…but all of them are based in fear, pride and lies. No matter how we rationalize it, it isn’t good for us to be alone. It’s not God’s design. It’s not His will. It puts us in a dangerous place.

The Lion that Prowls

We’ve all seen movies where the bad guy works to separate the group of friends. Maybe he breeds frustration. Maybe there are different traps that lure them away from one another. Whatever the plot points may be, we all know it’s dangerous when someone says “Let’s split up.” Bad things are getting ready to happen.

1 Peter 5:8 says “Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.”

When I talk to people who have been flying solo, I give them one of two views on this:

1. Lions don’t go after the gazelle in the middle of the herd. They go after the one that is off on it’s own, limping or sick.
   
2. If I were to drop you in the middle of the African savannah at night, and told you to walk to the nearest village, would you rather do that alone or with a large group of people?

Pride and fear are so often the roots of the lies that draw us to compromise and out into vulnerable and dangerous places. The church is a gathering of imperfect people who are daily being shown grace by God as He draws us more and more into His likeness. Every Christian is clothed with Christ. Every Christian is a living stone, being built together with Christ as our Chief Cornerstone. Just like one brick doesn’t make a house, one Christian cannot stand alone.

The Grace that Welcomes

If taking a full step back into church services is hard, then at least call and set up an appointment to talk with someone. Talking with the Pastor isn’t like going to the principal’s office. It’s like checking in at the ER so your healing can begin again.

You are welcome with the people of God. But we must all remain humble, seek to be teachable, and listen to good counsel as it is given. When we’ve flown solo for a bit, we tend to develop some incorrect ideas and understandings because we’ve had no one to discuss them with. But humble submission to God’s Word and the leadership in the church will bring you down the pathway of right thinking.

It’s okay to unlearn the things that got us where we were. If we don’t leave falsehood behind, then we’ll just wind up back where we were…separated from a lion with just a few blades of tall grass as cover.

And our Heavenly Father has better things in mind for His children. You must take up your cross and follow Jesus daily. And when we walk with Him, we’ll find ourselves walking with His bride, the church, too.

If you need help finding a healthy, local church, start here.